17 Habits To Strengthen The Parent-Child Relationship

It is important to strengthen and maintain the parent-child relationship. An important part of parenting is guiding your children and offering help with their daily routines.

This would mean setting boundaries, correcting their behavior if necessary, teaching them to say “no” and telling them what to do. However, your relationship with your children is so much more than just these “tasks”!

Raising a child is more than directing their lives in a way that you consider “right”. Enabling positive interactions with your children not only improves their emotional growth and education, it also makes your job easier. The following suggestions may seem pointless, but we promise they are not.

You probably already know how important it is to hug your kids. Virginia Satir, an American author and therapist, says we need four hugs a day to survive, eight hugs a day to stay where we are, and 12 hugs a day to grow.

However, can hugs rectify the bad times we’re going through with our kids? Let’s face it: every parent has had a bad moment with their child. There will always be negative interactions between parent and child that simply cannot be avoided or controlled.

Positive interactions to strengthen and maintain the parent-child relationship

We all long for those intimate moments with our children, the times when your heart simply  melts . Those moments of commitment are just as important to the parents as they are to the children. When the parent-child relationship is strong, it is worth all the sacrifices of parenthood.

This commitment is also – if you take everything back to basics – the only reason for children to voluntarily follow rules. Children who have a strong bond with their parents will want to cooperate. When they trust that you understand them and will always be on their side, they will feel motivated to follow your lead.

It’s not easy being a parent. It never was, but today it’s even more complicated. As parents, we know that we must dedicate time to our children and engage in one-on-one activities with them. However, does that make up for all the negatives? Fortunately, the answer to that is “yes.”

Several studies show that  you need at least five positive interactions during the day for every negative interaction. This balance makes it possible to build a healthy and happy relationship and thus strengthen the parent-child relationship.

The relationship can thus withstand the usual, everyday conflicts. If you don’t have enough positive interactions with each other, the balance will be hard to find.

Habits to strengthen the parent-child relationship

So if you lose this balance, your children will eventually ignore your advice. They will no longer want to follow you or accept your rules. When this balance leans in one direction, your child’s attitude will follow.

However, we are all so busy with all kinds of things. Where can we find time to establish these positive interactions with our children? When can we try to strengthen the parent-child relationship? Ultimately, the question is also  what can restore that important balance.

There are many things you can do to strengthen the parent-child relationship. Most importantly, you need to do these things daily to see the effects of the positive interactions. That’s why it’s so important that you incorporate these types of interactions into your daily routine.

The best part about implementing these ideas is that you’re not just compensating for worse moments. You make your whole day better with it. By focusing on the positive interactions, you leave less room for negative interactions.

Plus, if you make this a habit, your children will learn to cooperate better, argue less, and do their best to obey.

Habit 1 to 5 to try out

1.  Set aside some time each morning to spend with your kids. You don’t have to talk, a big hug is also enough. Hug them, pet them. Waking up this way is the best thing there is, isn’t it?

2. Talk to your kids over breakfast. Ask what they will be doing today and show interest in their answers.

3.  Leave sweet notes for them. You can leave one in their lunchbox, between the pages of their notebooks, or on their desk.

4. Sing and/or dance together to your children’s favorite music.

5. Always say goodbye with a hug and a kiss (if they like it too). Wish them a good day and have fun!

Habit 5 to 10 to try out

6.  Always greet your children with a hug and a kiss (again if they like that too). Show interest in their school day or whatever they did that day.

7. Don’t (or really do as little as possible) work-related things in front of your children. This includes phone calls, replying to emails, social media and the exchange of other direct messages.

8.  Tantrums are often a sign of anxiety. Kids don’t usually have tantrums just to challenge you. When this happens, try to relax and stop what you were doing.

Then help your child express his anger. Be there for him if he wants to give it a try and let him express all his emotions freely. When they’re ready, encourage them to talk about it. It is then up to you to listen.

9. Encourage your child when he has a difficult task ahead of him. Pay attention to his fears and offer positive reactions and sweet gestures.

10. Laugh at their jokes, no matter how silly they seem at times. However, if their jokes are disrespectful or inappropriate, gently tell them they aren’t funny.

Habit 10 to 15 to try out

11. Feel for your children, regardless of the nature of their emotions. You can limit their actions, but not their emotions. All emotions are therefore acceptable. When you acknowledge how your children are feeling, it helps strengthen the parent-child relationship. Not only this, but you also support the development of their emotional intelligence.

12.  Try to find some times each day where you can play with your children, again regardless of the type of play they like to do. Let their imagination run wild and follow their instructions.

It doesn’t matter if it’s long or short. Most importantly, it happens every day. Also try to plan it so it fits well into your child’s routine (for example, after coming home from school but before dinner).

13.  Share at least one meal a day with your kids. This means that you sit together at a table without the television in the background. Instead, start a conversation by asking a question about something that interests your kids.

14. Listen with compassion. Pay attention to what they tell you about the problems they experienced in school, especially those related to their friends or someone they like. Listening is one of the most important skills you can have to improve your parent-child relationship.

15.  Read or sing a lullaby after putting your kids to bed. If they are too old for this, encourage them to read for themselves before going to sleep. Show interest in the book they have chosen!

Habit 16 and 17 to try out

16.  Give your children a kiss and/or a hug before they go to sleep (again if they like it at the time). If they want to talk about something serious before going to sleep, listen up. If they are concerned about something, having a conversation about it will help them fall asleep.

17.  Take a quick look to see if everything is okay with your children before you go to sleep yourself. Even if they don’t know you’re doing this, it will make your relationship stronger.

Janet Fackrell made a sharp observation:  “Sometimes in the evening I look into our sleeping children’s room before I go to bed. I look at their heads with slightly disheveled hair as they sleep on the pillow, and suddenly I feel a sadness rising from within. Have I properly absorbed their smiles and laughter, hugged them, or just checked off a few items on my daily to-do list today? They grow so fast. Maybe one morning I wake up and one of my daughters is about to get married and I worry: have I played with them enough? Did I really enjoy the chance to be a part of their lives?”

Time flies by way too fast! So don’t miss your chance to build a strong relationship with your children!