The Manipulative Victim

There can be  benefits to always being the victim. In any way, the victim is always safe from criticism from others. Victims also receive compassion and understanding from many people, whatever they do. If anyone dares to question the alleged victim’s word, he can even count on criticism from those around him.

In many cases, victimization is  a strategy that offers more benefits than problems. This is a condition that provides a certain type of immunity. Everything they say is true, everything they do they do with good intentions and everything they think is legit. But  in more than one case, this victimization consciously or unconsciously conceals blackmail.

The victims

There are, of course, real situations of victimization,  such as when someone has experienced abuse. For example, if a person is attacked in the street or assaulted by someone else who has power over him that he cannot get out of: the power of a weapon, a uniform, position, and so on.

Such situations lead to an objective condition of victimization. But this condition is not forever, nor should it be a seal that the person always carries. After the situation of powerlessness is abandoned,  they remain in the victim role by choice, not as a finite reality.

One thing is certain:  a victim demands attention, care, support and affection. They require that dedication and understanding to get out of their state of shock and vulnerability. This cannot be argued.

What is open to interpretation is victimhood as an existential position. A traumatic event becomes an eternal cover letter. And not just to show a terrible fact, but to gain privileges that would otherwise not be attainable.

These are the kind of people who  make sure their suffering is accurately portrayed on the resume of their lives.

In more serious cases, some believe that being a victim of something gives them carte blanche to hate or hurt others.

Recognizing the Manipulative Victim

There are a number of characteristics of individuals who manipulate others by posing as victims. The main ones are:

• The victim does not ask directly for what he wants,  but prefers to send incomplete messages in the form of a complaint or apology. For example, they will suddenly tell you that no one knows how hard it was for them. Then you don’t know if they want you to praise their merit, or if they’re complaining because it hasn’t been so hard for you, or if they want you to help them with something.
• You feel guilty when you are with them. Every conversation you have with them gives you the impression that you are responsible for something, but you can’t put your finger on it. You feel sad or uncomfortable with yourself.
• The victim is suspicious and suspicious. They regularly point out the bad intentions of others and justify their misdeeds through their past suffering. They may even accuse you of harshness or apathy if you criticize them.

• They are able to make great sacrifices for others without having to ask. They brag about this. If someone has these characteristics, we can say that we are dealing here with a person who has assumed the role of victim in life. It is certainly someone who is not happy in that position and  behaves that way without wanting it.

Whatever the case, it is someone who has not been able to close his or her traumatic experience. He needs your understanding, but also your sincerity.

Image thanks to YoSeLin