The Anger We Hide Is The Most Dangerous

If you’re mad, why do you pretend you’re not? Yes, you often pretend and don’t say you don’t. Often we pretend we’re not angry to save face and to keep up appearances and because besides harming us, it shows others what they can do to control us and how they can take advantage of us to make.

The real problem is that you don’t know how to express your anger and you find it more comfortable if you control yourself. But the bubble will burst sooner or later.

And if we don’t learn to control our anger, it’s because it’s an emotion we don’t think about, because we believe it has nothing to do with us, or because we think we’ll get over it. Often we learn to avoid it so as not to harm our environment.

This may prevent toxic situations, but  suppressing our anger completely can have negative consequences.

Suppressed Anger and Your Health

We see emotions as abstract, as if the body were a container to hold them and a way to express them physically. But emotions manifest themselves physically and also in our minds.

Restrained anger can be a cause of serious health problems  that, while it may seem unrelated, sometimes are. Some of these problems are headaches, digestive problems, insomnia, anxiety, depression, high blood pressure, skin problems or heart problems (heart attack, palpitations).

Unprocessed anger and your behavior

If we don’t manage our emotions well, they can manifest unexpectedly and uncontrollably.

We can feel good at first by suppressing a tantrum so that we don’t hurt or offend anyone, but later we may lash out at others—  innocent people who have nothing to do with the situation—in a different way, because they are a minor threat to us. to be. You don’t mean to hurt them, but the anger bubbles up inside you and your confidence can evaporate.

Suppressed anger can also lead to anxiety disorders and irrational fear. The emotion comes out when given the chance.

How and where do you draw the line?

Realizing that anger is part of us is an important first step because it is the only way we can draw healthy boundaries. Are we angry because of something that others do or is the anger caused by a personal wound from the past that we cannot remember? Is it because of insecurity on our part or is the other really treating us badly?

The answers to these questions come when we face our anger. This knowledge gives us the  clarity to make the right decisions about the relationships we establish with others. We may need to step back and realize that others are not as bad as we thought.

Communicate Your Anger

While people sometimes have the intention to hurt people, most of the time this is not the case. Because we don’t want to hurt others with our anger, we suppress it. And especially when we feel guilty about our anger, we can internalize it and blame ourselves, without solving the real problem.

If we have the opportunity to get angry and analyze the reason for our anger, we will become more aware of the reason for it. This allows us to implement the tools needed to express the anger slowly, without causing further damage, through a healthy exercise in self-control.

Experiencing Anger Can Be Pleasant

Just as suppressed anger makes us feel bad, you will find it comforting to express it. It will be like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders. Consciously experiencing anger  is completely different from denying it. It can help us better understand ourselves and understand why certain things make us so angry.

This is not the same as continuously living in anger, but more like not pretending it doesn’t exist. Anger is a natural human emotion and we must allow ourselves to experience it. Only then can we learn to express it in a healthy way and make sure it doesn’t control us.