Two Consequences Of Yelling At Your Children

Thinking about the consequences of yelling at your kids can help you take control of yourself. That way you can eventually learn to control the impulse. By analyzing where the urge to yell at your children comes from and looking at these underlying causes, you  can find ways to change this behavior for good.

We are all familiar with the importance of instilling respect in your children. Plus, there are plenty of ways to punish lack of respect without yelling at your kids or putting them under house arrest. However, when we feel overwhelmed, we may experience an urge to scream. This leads to guilt, frustration and the feeling that we are bad parents.

You may not even realize that yelling at your children can have very negative consequences. Many people are not aware of that. So in this article we are going to discuss the two most dangerous consequences. These will always affect our children even once they are adults.

1. Yelling at your kids can undermine their confidence

Shouting suggests impatience and intolerance. When desperation strikes one or the other, we as humans are quick to raise our voices and ask for things by yelling. But yelling at children can make them feel like they’ve done something wrong. Even though the yelling is aimed at getting them to listen to you, this behavior can make the kids feel like they’re not living up to your expectations.

When this happens more often, it can come across as very wrong. In this way the children learn to believe that it does not matter what they do because it is never right. They may feel that they cannot satisfy you under any circumstances. The feeling that they can’t do anything right and deserve all the screaming  will be with them for the rest of their lives.

The basis of children’s self-confidence consists of elements that come from outside. With love and acceptance, their role models can make them feel like they can take on the world. Of course, that doesn’t mean you should exaggerate and fill them with an erroneous kind of self-confidence. Sometimes it is simply  necessary  for them to get frustrated. Your expectations should be adjusted according to their age and the knowledge they possess. Also, never forget that your children are not perfect.

Be understanding with your children

For example, it’s fairly common for parents to raise their voices to their kids when they’re in a rush in the morning. You just can’t expect your kids to be able to complete their tasks as quickly as you can. Their speed depends on their age and their level of autonomy. They may need some help getting themselves ready and on time.

If you don’t give them enough time or ask for something beyond their capabilities, you shouldn’t be surprised that they can’t do their job. However, you may be out of your mind and the children will feel that they can’t handle it. The undertone of this implies that you don’t love them because they are incompetent.

Remember that  it is every parent’s mission to help their children become more independent. In this way, you can encourage the development of genuine self-confidence. As time goes by, children will act appropriately. They will respect their parents, help around and around the house and clean their room on their own. Their actions stem from an understanding of the role they play in the household and the conviction that they are capable of anything, even on their own.

2. Yelling at your kids teaches them bad coping mechanisms

Parents should be role models for their children. When you’re constantly yelling and fidgeting, it shows that you’re incapable of controlling yourself. Children learn that screaming is an appropriate response to stress. They absorb these behavioral patterns and are likely to mimic them in the future.

Therefore, it is your responsibility as a parent  to learn to manage your emotions. Despite feeling scared, tired or angry, you should control your frustration around your children. Yelling at your kids for stress only teaches them that anger is a great reason to mistreat others.

Encourage your kids

It’s not their fault you feel upset or scared when they take a step forward.  Encourage them to explore and discover their true selves, no matter how difficult that may be. It is your role to accompany them on this journey. But as a parent you should also discover where your negative emotions come from.

You may want your children to behave in a way that you have chosen and not in the way that suits them as individuals. Maybe you’re afraid they’ll hurt themselves. However, yelling at your children to protect them or to channel their actions is not a good idea in most cases. It’s better to have faith that everything will be fine for them, that they are capable of taking care of themselves.

Conclusion

In this article, we discussed the most negative effects of yelling at your children. Because this behavior is so dangerous,  both parents need to learn to manage their emotions. In this way they can also learn new methods to solve problems and conflicts.

However, if you’ve ever yelled at your kids, don’t punish yourself for it. Nobody is perfect. The important thing is that you change this behavior now that you are aware of the harmful consequences.