When The Fire Is Out, Look For A New Flame
You probably already know, without anyone having to tell you, that a relationship only works well if it flows without too much effort and effort. You deserve people who fan the flames of your desires, not people who extinguish those flames. You just need to be brave enough to keep repeating that to yourself until you believe in it yourself. Don’t exhaust yourself in front of a campfire that has long been extinguished. It is important to free up space so that a new fire can flare up again.
You may feel a certain kind of hope. You may feel that experiencing all those burning flames next to someone has left a certain spark. However, it might be wise to learn that if there’s no way to share your life with this person again, it might be because all that’s left of your crush is the ashes.
“Be safe, free yourself from all risks.
Don’t waste your time resuscitating things that are already dead.
Stay safe and take care of your moments.
Don’t waste your breath inhaling that which has already gone up in smoke.”
-Adriane Moragues, song ‘Be Safe’-
So if you are absolutely sure that it is no longer worth trying to keep trying, then there is only one alternative left and that is to accept it. Immediately give that open wound the chance to develop a scab. We all have to let our wounds heal at some point; therefore allow yourself the time you need to recover. Take some time for yourself until you are able to start over and start a new fire.
You need time and space
It makes no sense to rekindle the fire with two hands, especially since it was initially lit with four hands.
An emptiness and sadness has arisen because this flame, which you had worked so hard on, has gone out. This can make you depressed and it is quite possible that you are not sure how to move forward.
However, when you find yourself in such a situation, acceptance is the best gift you can give yourself. Accept that most things have an expiration date and relationships are no exception. Everything has its own timing. So take the ashes that are left from the fire and convert these ashes into lessons.
Knock out the dents and relieve yourself
A modern poet, Pedro Adreu, once said the following: “ You learn to live through the blows and blows. ” This could practically be a universal law. If you think about all that you have experienced and endured, you will remember very well that blow you had to dodge. You will also never forget how you managed this, how you avoided that blow and just kept moving forward.
Sooner or later, the wound will start to itch with doubts, but at the same time it means that your skin will grow back. And if you manage not to scratch off the itchy scab, you’ll end up with just a scar and a memory that contains many more positive aspects than pain and sadness. You will learn to love this new skin. You will find love again, but in a different way. Lovers are never the same. Often the last one is just as beautiful or even more beautiful than the previous one.
Give new flames a chance to light up your life
Unfortunately, you ended up in a situation where you had to end a relationship that you really wanted to keep going forever. In situations like this, it’s normal to withdraw and cut yourself off from new opportunities to share your life with someone again. Maybe you’re just not ready yet.
Nevertheless, you managed to get back to the place where your heart was broken. If you’ve forgiven that person and don’t care if you ever see them again or if they see you with someone else, you won’t be looking for someone to replace them with. Once you’ve done all of this, you’re ready to enjoy the warmth of a new campfire. As the song goes: ‘You have managed to survive, now make the choice to smile’. In other words: you managed to survive, now make the choice to laugh.
